Sew, So, Ceaux, I'm anxious. The Bible tells us not to be anxious about anything. Normally, my anxiety would probably turn into worry that I'm wallowing in anxiety...and sort of spiral in an unhealthy direction towards un-worship and self-pity. (so, thankfully I'm not TOO anxious of a person..). But right now, I almost feel like this anxiety is a joke-test that God is playing on me. Immediately when I felt myself get anxious today, I thought of how i could pray my way into peace, and submit to "rest" in today instead of think about how I'm going to be in states in a WEEK. But there's really no way to not think about it. So, I think instead of trying to bring peace upon myself, God has showed up in writing...snatching the rug from underneath my feet. He's so cool. I love when my ways don't work out the way I think they should.
Today I read some letters and journal entries....basically testimonies of day-in and day-out wreckage of the Holy Spirit in action....and I can't help but be thankful. So thankful God is working at my anxiety to bring my eyes and thoughts back to Him. SO thankful that He can RE-reveal to His children that we are indeed HIS poiema, as we read back to ourselves the poetry that He has allowed us to create on paper. What a great circle to see! I don't know why, but I find myself shaking my head in unbelief at these small revelations. When I see the subtle ways the Lord redirects our thinking. But why in unbelief? Oh me of little faith.
But the glass is half full (always), at least there is a little faith....which can be built upon when He, the Maker of poetry, lures us back in...oh so gracefully.
Yes, be gone anxiety.